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Post by Brightpaw <3 on Nov 25, 2013 22:00:55 GMT -5
Brightkit is overjoyed by the fact her apprentice ceremony is today she shrieked the words out loud "I'm finally an apprentice, look out Skyclan here I come!" as she jumps for the trees and leaps from tree to tree she mews and yowls in triumph and when she's jumping Goldenwing jumps up to the tree in front of her and says "Brightkit where do you think YOUR going you should be in the nursery!" and she whines saying "But Goldenwing i'm six moons old!" and Goldenwing says "Ahhh but Cederstar hasn't performed your apprentice ceremony yet so technically your still a kit which means back in the nursery for you!" and Brightkit reluctantly pads back to the nursery muttering about how Goldenwing is "Captain Buzzkill". Brightkit then wakes up from a long and restful nap to the sound of Cederstar yowling her name constantly and she runs to see what he wants only to discover she slept until her ceremony! She leaps and mews with excitement as she rushes to Cederstar who after he says the formal apprentice ceremony pledge and Brightkit says "O you know I do!" and all the other cats glance awkwardly at each other and Cederstar chuckles and says "Then I now pronounce you Brightpaw, apprentice of Ashtail, I hope you serve Skyclan well." The next day Brightpaw wakes up from a restful nights sleep in the apprentice den to hear the deputy and her mentor, Ashtail yowling in her face saying "Get up, it's time for your first day of training!" Brightpaw reluctantly gets up saying "Fine but you'll have to deal with me ALL day!" Ashtail then tells her "Then I guess i'll just watch you like a hawk and report you to Cederstar ALL day!" Then ocnce they set off for the forest tour she was saying "Ooooo four trees, I bet you'll never jump high enough to climb it!" then Ashtail, just to keep her from going there condidering she hasn't been taught the skyward jump said "O Cedarstar, Brightpaw tried to climb four trees, better postpone her warrior ceremony for a moon!" then she gave him a sour look and said "I was wrong i guess YOUR the real captain buzzkill!" Then Ashtail thought to himself "This is going to be a LONG six moons." The End
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Post by Whitedove on Nov 25, 2013 22:12:33 GMT -5
Nice! Will you make an entire story or is this just for her apprenticeship?
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Post by Brightpaw <3 on Nov 26, 2013 9:54:33 GMT -5
Nice! Will you make an entire story or is this just for her apprenticeship? Sure i just got to get a good idea in my head first i've only written 2 stories before this plus i'm a newborn kit speaking of that...... How do you rank up? It would help! continuation begins in next post on this thread!
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Post by Brightpaw <3 on Nov 26, 2013 10:20:25 GMT -5
Chapter 1 Brightpaw wakes up from another night of sleep to Ashtail's yowling about how she's the laziest apprentice he's ever worked with and to get up. Then Brightpaw simply replies "For a deputy you sure are a hothead!" then Ashtail replies "Just get up and start training you mousebrain!" then Brightpaw says fine but you'll pay for pushing me around." then Ashtail says "Okay then i'll just tell Cederstar how you made me pay!" then Brightpaw says "Fine i'll just go to the training forest and think about how much I hate you!" then Ashtail says "All right then we'll see how much you hate me when I teach you the skyward leap!" Then Brightpaw says "Yay, lets go!" then Ashtail says "Finally" then at the training forest Ashtail explains the skyward leap to his apprentice. Ashtail says "Okay Brightpaw put all your weight on your haunches and then jump as high as you possibly can!" to Ashtail's surprise Brightpaw preforms her task perfectly then he says "Good now try and catch that bird with your new skill!" then Brightpaw leaps sky high and swipes the bird down with one hit then Ashtail says "Amazing work Brightpaw I should say we're done for today!" then Brightpaw says "Great time for a nap!"
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Post by Whitedove on Nov 26, 2013 11:18:40 GMT -5
Nice! Will you make an entire story or is this just for her apprenticeship? Sure i just got to get a good idea in my head first i've only written 2 stories before this plus i'm a newborn kit speaking of that...... How do you rank up? It would help! continuation begins in next post on this thread! You rank up based on how many posts you have. To rank up faster, you could join an RP or participate in Forum Games. Also, for the story, it is good so far, but I think there should be more detail. I mean, brightpaw is just starting as an apprentice and she learns the skyward leap in one try. It is possible but not probable. Still, I like the story and you should keep on writing.
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Post by Brightpaw <3 on Nov 28, 2013 0:30:52 GMT -5
CHAPTER 2 ————————— It has been a moon since Brightpaw's seccond day of training she wakes up to the calm tone of Ashtail telling her to get up for training they have gotten used to eachother in the moon they've trained together Ashtail tells her that it's time for him to teach her the proper way to hunt a hawk and to be careful for they are very defensive creatures and Brightpaw didn't listen and the hawk gave her a deep cut on her shoulder with it's talon and she fell instantly luckily Ashtail broke her fall and he told her to be more careful then just as they were about to try again Featherpaw broke in and reported to Ashtail, claiming that one of their queens, Voletail, and his own mother, lost her life to a badger. Featherpaw sat vigil for her all night and so did Brightpaw for she was a very good friend of her's. In the morning, still mewling over Voletail, started grimacing in pain and she remembered the cut she got from the hawk, she padded over to the medicine cat den where Squirrelclaw examined her shoulder and gave her some juniper berries and advised her to stay over night though her sleep was more restless than comfortable.
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Post by Brightpaw <3 on Nov 28, 2013 0:38:11 GMT -5
Sure i just got to get a good idea in my head first i've only written 2 stories before this plus i'm a newborn kit speaking of that...... How do you rank up? It would help! continuation begins in next post on this thread! You rank up based on how many posts you have. To rank up faster, you could join an RP or participate in Forum Games. Also, for the story, it is good so far, but I think there should be more detail. I mean, brightpaw is just starting as an apprentice and she learns the skyward leap in one try. It is possible but not probable. Still, I like the story and you should keep on writing. well i try 2 do as much detail as possible and also some of it might seem a little crappy because most of the stuff i write is with the mobile version
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Post by Whitedove on Nov 28, 2013 12:50:17 GMT -5
The badger now must DIE!
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Post by Brightpaw <3 on Nov 29, 2013 0:37:53 GMT -5
Chapter 3 Brightpaw pads into a strange forest filled with strange scents and she scented one scent that seemed familiar and she screeched "Voletail!" then Voletail said "Yes, it is me." then Brightpaw said "How, your dead!" then Voletail said "Yes, I know, i'm speaking to you from Starclan." then Brightpaw said "How, i'm an apprentice not a medicine cat or clan leader!" then Voletail said "I know this message was only meant for your ears, listen Brightpaw, great trouble is coming, teeth and claws will meet, and blood will flow like a river. Brightpaw instantly woke up to the sound of Ashtail telling her to get up for it is time to get back at that hawk although her dream made her not feel like it very much. This time she let Ashtail demonstrate he used the skyward leap and aimed his swipe at the hawk's wing and finished it with a killing bite. Brightpaw did the same and did it perfectly having learned from her mistakes. When she finished her session Cederstar padded forward and she wondered why then she remembered the gathering was tonight and Cederstar asked her about the last thing she thought he'd say, he asked her if she wanted to go to the gathering and she replied "yes". On the way there she couldn't forget about the impending doom Voletail has prophecised.
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Post by Brightpaw <3 on Nov 30, 2013 1:31:26 GMT -5
Chapter 4 Brightpaw was at the gathering and she saw her mother she went to talk to her and Goldenwing said "Brightpaw, i waited until the best time to tell you this but there are two Shadowclan cats you need to meet, Nightwhisker and Darkpaw, they are..... they're..... ugh, your kin, Darkpaw is your brother and Nightwhisker is your real father, I.. I... I should have told you before..... but i was frightened, I'm sorry, you wouldn't have remembered as a newborn kit." Brightpaw was utterly stunned and she said "It's okay mother, I understand why you hid this from me i'll, go meet my father, and hopefully he'll explain to my brother." She padded over to Nightwhisker and told him that she knew and he said "So, I finally meet my daughter!" then Darkpaw was easedropping and he said "Nightwhisker! You never told me I had a Thunderclan sister But, why?!" then Nightwhisker replied "Because, young one, I had a Thunderclan mate, who's also YOUR REAL MOTHER!" he pointed with his tail and said "She's there if you want to introduce yourself." Darkpaw padded to Goldenwing. Then the clan leaders announced very small amounts of info all Skyclan said was the death of one of their queens (there wasn't a lot going on in those days) snd both Darkpaw and Brightpaw lay awake thinking about the secret kept away from them for so many moons.
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Post by Willowleaf on Dec 1, 2013 18:51:07 GMT -5
Keep on writing! It does go a little quickly, though. Also: ... all Skyclan said was the death of one of their queens (there wasn't a lot going on in those days)... A death's not a lot?
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Post by Brightpaw <3 on Dec 10, 2013 20:59:30 GMT -5
well yes but like i was talkin bout like alot alot for example in the power of three series where Blackstar is constantly trying to steal Thunderclan territory because of mixed blood, or in the first series where 4 clans became 2 and blood ruled the forest
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Post by Deleted on Dec 11, 2013 15:31:03 GMT -5
Or in the Omen of the Stars where Tigerstar is like :< BLA BLA BLA I WANNA KILL EVARYTHING and StarClan is like NO NO NO NO and then Jayfeather and Lionblaze are like WHEREZ HOLLYLEAF
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Post by Brightpaw <3 on Dec 20, 2013 3:06:41 GMT -5
well actually as far as i am in the series their still paws but don't worry youtube videos already spoiled it 4 me :/
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Post by Brightpaw <3 on Dec 20, 2013 3:09:37 GMT -5
o and srry i haven't posted in a while and i PROMISE i'll start posting mor chapters around the 25th! srry 4 da wait ˘³˘
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